kakujofandomcom-20200213-history
Kakujo
Brief Biography "An avid gamer-turned-father, Kakujo does what he can to balance parenting with his apparent hobby of communicating with denizens of the game world. Having a child drags him outside more often than he’d like (i.e. – more than the necessary 10 minutes per day), but thanks to Lily having also acquired a taste for gaming, he still finds himself in many a shenanigan." -Kakujomics Description Relationships Tenoreo *Kakujo is Tenoreo's loving boyfriend. Lily *Kakujo is Lily's loving father. Narun *Kakujo is Narun's cousin. Hamus *Kakujo is Hamus' brother. Fun Facts *Kakujo's favorite colour is maroon. *Kakujo was born in 1988 Completion Rate *((189 Appearances - 42 - 7 ) / 189 Appearances) x 100 = 74% Quotes *"Sweet Jerry Jesus!" -Kakujo *"DANGIT! SHOOT! CRAP! BUTT NUGGETS IN HELL!" -Kakujo 2014 *"Go empty it! Wait, I'm encouraging someone to pee, forget I said that." -Kakujo 2015 *"Remember: Things you say are only inspirational if you're famous!" -Kakujo 2015 *"BACK FLIPPING ISP MONOPOLY BUCKET SPACKLE." -Kakujo 2015 *"Grapenuts are a pure experience. PUT DOWN THE BANANA." -Kakujo 2015 *"I don't mind dying, I just don't like knowing when it's coming, I don't like knowing when anything is coming. Balls, a shot, a paycheck, y'know? I just like having that extra little element of surprise in my life. When am I gonna pay rent? When am I gonna eat? I wanna live by the seat of my pants, not even the pants! I don't even want to know when the pants are coming! Y'know? Roll out of bed, am I gonna have pants? I don't know." -Kakujo 2015 *"I'm the little mermaid right now, in Ireland, Wanting breakfast rolls." -Kakujo 2015 *"Son of a bumplestump." -Kakujo 2015 *"Yeah, now I have forms. Punk. Where's my forms?" - Kakujo 2015 *"The point of this level... IS TO GET MAXIMUM PLEASURE." - Kakujo 2015 *"People don't like bread anymore, they like Playdoh because it's 2015." - Kakujo 2015 *"...I think a player should be killed when they've failed. That way there is no waste of time." - Kakujo 2015 *"Maybe I shouldn't have ate that baby. Maybe that baby was on some kind of drug. Maybe now I am on that drug." - Kakujo 2015 *"Technology can advance, but it's not going to make me a spaghetti dinner, it's kind of a prerequisite for me." - Kakujo 2015 *"Unclench the butt, for it is done." Kakujo 2015 *"Opinions are like buttholes. Claiming it's a fact doesn't make it a fact. It's still a butthole." - Kakujo 2015 *"You played with fire, and now here's your child." -Kakujo 2015 *"Alright girls, you know the drill, get in the hole~" -Kakujo 2015 *"If being pensive means staring off into space and thinking about ghost booty, then call me Dumbledore." -Kakujo 2015 *"Is Mouse Hunt the one where a guy mails himself in a box, but forgets to put holes in it and someone eats him because they mistake him for moldy bread?" -Kakujo 2015 *"Wake up and smell your own fart" -Kakujo 2015 *"There was something about those Kraft cheese commercials, something about all that viscous goo was just...EROTIC, ya know?" -Kakujo 2015 *"I love this Doritos Dr. Seuss stuff coming out of my butt." -Kakujo 2015 *"i'm here to slap baby buttcheeks and chew on taffy" -Kakujo 2015 *"I'm wearing sunglasses because I'm very photosensitive. And sometimes I can feel a migraine coming on and I have to fight off the sparkles." -Kakujo 2015 *"Why are you breaking wood with a pickaxe? And why are you opening and closing a door? Is this art?" -Kakujo 2015 *"A ton of people can't be wrong." -Kakujo 2016 *"Nine times out of ten, a penny has been inside of a hobo's rectum." -Kakujo 2016 *"Come on, at least look at me so I don't feel as bad for doing this."﻿ -Kakujo 2016 *"That's the trick to defeating these female types, you call them your waifu and it creeps them THE HELL out, which gives you time to splatch them. You know what I'm saying?" -Kakujo 2015